Embrace the Suck! Not just in training but in life.

Usually, "Embrace the suck" is a phrase used by athletes to convince themselves that suffering in training makes the races easier, but it can be a life mantra as well.  Last weekend was my 11th wedding anniversary, my wife's too as it happens, and we were talking about what we've experienced together over the years. The funny thing is, most everything we talked about was the times that things went wrong. But those were the times that made us smile. Obstacles thrown in our way that we managed to shrug off and made us closer and happier together.

Without question the biggest test of our early relationship was our ill-fated trip to San Francisco. Somehow we got it into our heads that we should pack up and head off to the city by the bay for a vacation in the summer of 2000. We hadn't been dating that long but we knew that we were in it for the long haul and I think that made us think we were more grown up than we really were. I was 19 and Kim was 21 and we jumped in my K-car and headed off down the road. We didn't have ANY money so we camped the whole way and ate cup-a-soups for more than half our meals.

Surprisingly, the trip down went without a hitch. We didn't have air conditioning, cruise control or GPS but we didn't miss a beat. In addition to being broke, the exchange rate was the worst it has been in the last 50 years. We were paying $1.61 for every American dollar and it was tough to even justify a chocolate bar at the gas station. It was a lot like Dumb and Dumber, we were on a very tight budget. Unfortunately for us we didn't have a dead bird to sell to the blind neighbour kid for extra cash.

We walked the pier, did the Alcatraz at Night tour and had an absolute blast.

The next day we started for home. At a little town called Garberville, CA we heard a rattling and thought we should pull over and readjust our luggage. Then the oil light came on on the dashboard. Uh oh. I put it in neutral and cruised down the hill into town and pulled into a local mechanic. This guy could have been right out of central casting. He had the coveralls, the floppy hat and the rag in his back pocket. He pulled out a long screwdriver, put it to his ear and held it to different parts of the engine. He shook his head and told us we had blown a connector rod. I made an equally concerned face, (I had no idea what this meant but I could tell this was the right thing to do) and asked how much this would cost. He explained that he couldn't fix that, we'd need to get our K-car towed to Oregon and get a hotel room and then pay to fix the engine. I did some quick math and it was MUCH more than the vehicle was worth. We thanked the guy for his help and drove the car into a parking lot and started walking around town trying to figure out what to do.

We made our way to the Waterwheel Restaurant and got a table. We decided we should try and scrap the car, buy bus tickets and make our way home to Canada. The waitress made some small talk with us and found out our story and she took pity on us. The story made it's way around town pretty quickly and soon, while we were trying how to figure out how to deal with the worst day of our lives, people were popping in to say "hi" to the Canadians. Seriously, like a half dozen separate people came in just to talk to us. We walked across town to the scrap yard and tried to sell the car to them but the only guy that worked there was out with his truck pulling a semi out of the ditch 4 hours away and wouldn't be back until tomorrow. So, back to the Waterwheel. We didn't want to just abandon the car so we decided to try and sell it. To the busboy. For a dollar. The worst part was the guy had to hum and hah over a $1 car! Eventually he decided that, worst case scenario, he could just scrap it for $100 and make a tidy profit so he took it off our hands.

Perfect, problem solved. So we just needed to get home. As it happened, just across the street was the Singing Salmon. What is the Singing Salmon you ask? What ISN'T the Singing Salmon? It is the local record store, UPS courier franchise AND the Greyhound depot. We popped in and asked to buy 2 tickets to Vancouver, BC. As luck would have it, Kim's parents were in Vancouver on holidays and told us to get there and they'd give us a ride home. The ornery fellow in the Singing Salmon said he was closing in 5 minutes and because of our bags wouldn't have enough time to process us before he closed so we'd have to wait until tomorrow. Defeated we walked back across the street to the Waterwheel and sat back down at "our" table. Kim had a brainstorm, one of the few in our time together, and she thought, "hey, if you can buy concert tickets on the phone, why not bus tickets?" This was the pre-internet era so going online wasn't even an option. Greyhound was awesome and told us we just had to stand outside of the local bus depot when the bus pulled up and the driver could sell us a ticket at the next major stop. So, the dick at the Singing Salmon wanted the commission but didn't want to stay a few minutes late. Such a clown.

We went back  to the restaurant and told Kathy, the waitress, the good news. We just needed to be out front of the bus depot at 1am when the bus came. Her eyes got really big. Apparently, one of the solutions to the homeless problem in San Francisco was to give these wayward folks a bus ticket out of town. One of the most common destinations is..... Garberville, CA!

She refused to let us sit outside on the sidewalk until 1 in the morning and instead took us home with her after work for a few hours. She dropped us back off and waited until the bus had us safely on our way. On the 27 hour bus ride to Vancouver we made some friends from Mexico and I played a game that appeared similar to rock-paper-scissors. I didn't know the rules because the kid I was playing against only spoke Spanish and I only speak English, but some how he always won. We had another couple of funny incidents too. In Portland we had a bit of a layover in the bus depot so I sat on a bench just outside the front door. As I sat down a Honda Civic came to a screeching halt right in front of me and the driver asked, "Yo man! You need some batteries?" I said, "uh, no." And he roared off. I was rattled so I went back inside and sat down in a corner. Kim was sitting next to a black guy and he leaned over and asked if she wanted to buy his CD. She instinctively reached over and pulled her purse closer and he did not appreciate this. He started yelling at her that she was a "white bitch" and that he was just a regular dude and she needed to get her head straight.  She walked away and ended up guiding a blind man around the bus depot because he couldn't see where he was going and no one seemed to want to help the poor guy.

Eventually the bus showed up.  Our next stop was in downtown Seattle at 2am. I popped inside to use the washroom and as soon as I crossed the threshold I spun on my heel and walked out. The dirt and smell that hit me were too much to handle and I decided that I'd go on the bus when we re-boarded. If you decide that a Greyhound bus is a better option for you, you know it's bad. After a short stop we were back aboard and on our way to Vancouver where Kim's dad and his lifelong friend's wife Pat picked us up. After that it was smooth sailing all the way back to Edmonton. You've never seen two people so happy to be wedged into the back of a 2 door Sunfire for a 12 hour car ride.

This could easily have been one of the worst experiences of our lives but the stories that Kim and I have gotten out of it are amazing. Plus, we know we can adapt and survive and it has made our relationship stronger.

On our honeymoon we went to Tofino, BC on Vancouver Island.

This beautiful sea-side town has an amazing little hotel called the Middle Beach Lodge. It was BEAUTIFUL! As we parked the car they even had a porch with rain jackets and rubber boots for you to take and walk the beach hand-in-hand looking for seashells. We got to the front desk and asked for our room. The girl at the front desk flipped through the reservations and said, "I don't see your name." We pulled out the brochure of Tofino accommodations and after some digging realized that the phone number I had called were for the previous hotel alphabetically. The Maquinna Lodge. The Maquinna Lodge is tastefully appointed with a wallpapered water pipe running the length of the room and a large hole in the wall we discovered when messing around moving pictures on the wall.   We did, however, have a view of the ocean. Not a great one and you had to look through all of the power lines and over the co-op grocery store but technically you could see the ocean. And we were REALLY close to the neighborhood bar - it was right under our room.  Luckily, the front desk staff realized we had made a mistake and allowed us to cancel the second night that we had booked. This could have been devastating as we had gotten married when I was still in University and we were broke but we just looked at each other and laughed hysterically.

It's experiences like this that can really make you or break you. How do you react when faced with adversity? Do you see the humour and opportunity in these situations or do you freak out and break down? This is not to say that I don't have my occasional spaz outs or overreact to bad news but overall I'm pretty calm, cool and collected and even overly happy about bad situations.

This has been absolutely critical in Ironman racing. When you're feeling exhausted after 5 hours on a bike and some teenager yells at you that you're fat and an elderly gentleman gives you the finger you can either get bummed out or you can laugh at just how ridiculous it all is.

I would strongly urge you to take any opportunity you can to look at a everything life throws at you and find the funny, no matter how hard you have to look.

Ironman Texas

I went into Ironman Texas in a really weird place. I was coming off my mind-numbing performance at IM Arizona where I went sub-12 and essentially had a perfect race. I've spent the last 6 months trying to convince myself, with limited results, that I would be fine with being slower this time. This sounds really good but the truth is that the nature of athletics is one of competition and a constant desire to get better. I think I was in the doldrums, I had completed 5 Ironman races, I was coming off of my best performance and what was I proving by doing another race? This is all ridiculous as every race is its own animal and I need each one of them equally to get to Kona but this one just felt blah.

The reality of the situation was that the hot weather (although cooler than usual for south Texas), the undulating bike course, the wind, and the fact that I did all of my training for this race indoors meant that going sub-12 would be a Herculean feat. I set out my goals ahead of time and picked a realistic but optimistic goal of going sub-13 with the breakdown of a 1:15 swim, a 5:45 bike and a 5:12 run plus 15 minutes for transition (I know this is like 12:30 but there's a buffer).

Mom came with me again and acted as my Iron Sherpa. It's such a huge help to have someone there that can hand you tools when you build you bike or help drag your luggage and just be a general helper. It would be amazing to have my family at the races but the thought of taking 2 adults and 3 small children on an airplane for a weekend where I'm tied up with racing would just be a nightmare financially and logistically.

How does a moth get IN BETWEEN the 2 panes of glass on an airplane?

We landed in Houston, got the baggage and headed off to our little Best Western by the airport. A nice little place that was just for the night as we were headed off to the sweet race hotel the next day. The Woodlands Waterway Marriott was the race hotel and it is awesome. A little more expensive than I'm used to but since mom was paying I felt like it would be worth trying it out, and I was right! This was such a cool area that I saw, without question, one of the most interesting sights I've ever seen. A Ferrari with a triathlon bike strapped on the back. I honestly couldn't decide if it was awesome or the douchiest thing I've ever seen. 

Our room was on the 12th floor which was second from the top and had a nice little balcony. From the balcony you could see the waterway and the race expo. For anyone that's done Ironman you can appreciate being able to walk to all of the events associated with the race and not having to try and find parking everywhere you go. The only downside was that the music and associated construction noise with the finish line area was too loud to leave the window open at night.

The white tents are the race expo, from my hotel balcony

 The next couple of days mom and I did some shopping and caught a movie. I absolutely love seeing movies before a race. It's the perfect environment; a cool place where you can sit down out of the sun and do something that takes your mind off of the impending torture that you're subjecting yourself to. We skipped the race dinner and instead opted to go to the Cheesecake Factory which was a great call. I had a really nice meal and wrapped it up with an unreal piece of carrot cake. Om nom nom! The night before we did what has now officially become a tradition and had dinner at P.F. Chang's. SO GOOD!

In what universe is this a good idea? They were on sale, weird hey?

Apparently Target is French for "buzz kill." This totally ruined my plans.

Race Day:

Being that we were so close to the race site I didn't have to wake up until 5:40am. This was really nice. Kind of a sleep in as far as Ironman's concerned. I put on my sweatsuit and beanie and headed down to transition and by the time I had gotten to the end of the block my shirt was already soaked in sweat. The humidity seemed pretty intense and I started to worry. I'm from the northern most real city in Canada and we don't get heat or humidity very often. In fact, I flew to Las Vegas 2 weeks before the race to train in some heat and we had to de-ice the plane because snow was accumulating on the wings. ON MAY 2nd!!! 

I was unaware just how far it was from transition to the swim start and as I was entering the transition area to put my aero bottle on my bike they were announcing that we had to leave as transition was closing in 5 minutes. "Zoinks!" Fortunately my bike was in good shape and I didn't need to get anything done to it. I started walking towards the swim start, and walking, and walking. It turned out to be about a mile walk. This ordinarily wouldn't be a huge deal but when you're going to cover 140.6 miles in the coming hours that extra mile is just rude man. 

Once in transition I lubed up (let that image sink in) and started putting on my wetsuit. Just as I pulled up on it to get it up my thighs it got really easy to pull on it. I had just blown the crotch out of my wetsuit, 10 minutes before the start. OH COME ON! I was already not feeling super motivated and this was just an extra kick in the junk. This was a deep water start so we started making our way into the water 15 minutes before the gun would go off. I waded out into the water and floated around thinking about the day that was laid before me. I may come off as a goofball and somewhat easy going but when it comes to triathlon I tend to get very spiritual. The day before the race my mom and I went for a walk and she was asking me how I felt about the race. I told her I wasn't sure how I felt about it and that I wasn't sure I was ready. Just then there was a viewing area with a sign that said, "the journey is the reward." As I floated on my back waiting for the start I started think about my late father and told him that I would need his help to get through the day. Just then I looked over and even though it was bright sun the moon was visible. My dad was a huge space nerd and told us his greatest dream was to go to outer space. I'm not a religious person at all but if there is an afterlife I always imagine my dad hangs out around the moon and that where I look when I want to talk to him. Knowing him and how clumsy he was I also imagine that he would go and check out Neil Armstrong's footprints on the moon and ultimately sneeze, erasing them forever.

Within 5 minutes of starting the swim I got kicked right in the face. A pretty good shot actually. This caused my goggles to suction to my left eye and was really painful. I elected to rip off my goggles and made my way, at a 90 degree angle to the other swimmers, to a kayak where I could hang out and replace my goggles. This is like a game of frogger and really kinda fun to do. I got myself settled and back onto the course. At 45 minutes into the swim one of the people next to me accidentally hooked their hand in my goggles and ripped them off my face again. I've never lost my goggles even once in a race and now it's happening a second time. OH COME ON!

It's a really fun course. You go out and back in the main part of the lake and then turn right into a canal that is only about 10 metres wide. This is really fun because you don't need to look too hard to see where you're going. There's walls on both sides and you just swim straight to the finish. I got out of the water in 1:12 and was very happy with that.

I made my way through transition and quickly found my bike. Once on the bike I was very comfortable. This area has quickly become my favourite part of triathlon as it turns out I can cycle pretty well. The course is really pretty, you head out of town very quickly and into the wooded areas north of Houston. It is actually through Sam Houston National Forest and the riding is quite fun. It is overall pretty flat but you make the occasional small climb followed by a short descent where you can build some decent speed. The first 90km (56 miles) was fairly uneventful and I was clipping along nicely. As we headed back into town, however, the wind shifted into our face. Now life started to suck.

There was a group of about 10 of us that stuck together for the most part and we started joking around and talking about just how awful the wind and the roads were on the way back. The pavement on the majority of the course was not nice smooth asphalt, it was chip asphalt that creates a hum through the frame of your bike, into your bones and eventually infiltrates your soul. It's not too bad over short distances but for 100km (60 miles) straight it gets to be a bit of a nuisance. Additionally, the roads in the National Forest were pothole-ridden. Ironman did an amazing job marking the holes with fluorescent tape so you could see them coming. Unfortunately, when you're in a tight pack you don't always see the hole coming, just some dude's spandex clad bum that suddenly jerks to the left and you hammer into the hole and knock a filling or two loose. 

At the 140km mark I did my ceremonial thank you to Roxi Martinez. As I've mentioned before, at Ironman Los Cabos I was so emotionally and physically drained at the 140km mark that I was unsure if I could go on. Just then I saw Roxi, whose 3 sons I've coached and whose husband was racing. I pulled over and hugged her and started to cry. She gave me the strength to carry on and I will never forget this. 

Shortly after this I had a great laugh. Ironman necessitates some traffic snarls and the locals aren't always endeared to us. As we cycled past Magnolia High School there was a truck full of teenage boys that were angry about being stopped and as I passed they yelled, "we can still tell you're fat!" I laughed, but deep down inside I died a little. This was quickly forgotten as two vehicles later an elderly gentleman gave me half of a middle finger. To be fair to him it was 100% of the finger he had left but this made me laugh out loud and brought me back into a happy place. I managed to avoid any major bike damage and rolled into transition in 5:42. 3 minutes ahead of my 5:45 goal.

I didn't escape the bike totally undamaged, however. As I got off the bike it became very apparent that my feet had both cramped. This was a moment of panic for me. As I shuffled from my bike towards our bags full of run gear I honestly wondered if I was going to be able to complete the race. Transition took me almost 11 minutes as I was hoping that my feet would release. They didn't really ease up much and I made my way out onto the run course. 

As I limped down the course I made the decision that I wouldn't quit no matter what, I would force them to pull me off the course either due to medical DQ or based on time running out. It turned out I was being a bit overdramatic and after 3 miles my feet let go pretty well and I was able to jog part time.  At this point it became obvious I was not going to equal my PR and I started to feel sorry for myself. I then saw a sign on the course that said, "run the race that's set before you." It was just sharpie on poster board but it really made a big difference to me. I was able to look at the challenge of cramped feet and see it as just another challenge on my way to Kona.

The run was 3 loops around the lake at the Woodlands and was a really nice atmosphere. The hardest part was trying to run when there was a crowd because nobody wants to walk when people are looking. The place I tried the hardest was a section of the course where the local Lululemon girls had a cheering station. It was a difficult balance running slow enough to appreciate their yoga pants while running fast enough to look like I was very athletic. I think I managed to pull it off, but I was also dehydrated and sunstroked so maybe they weren't even there at all.

The highlight of the run course, for me, was a 20-something guy that had a different sign for each lap of the loop. They were a perfect combination of hilarious and offensive so they were right up my alley. The best of these was a picture of shamed NBA owner Donald Sterling referring to his now infamous comments about black people. The sign said, "140.6 miles, another race I'm not fond of." I started laughing so hard I actually had to take a walking break because I couldn't breathe well enough to jog any more. 

I hauled myself around the course and managed to finish in 6:05, much slower than I'd hoped but I was happy to be done.  I stopped short of the finish and gave my mom a hug and left her with the instructions, "get the car!" I was not prepared to walk the half mile from the finish line to my bike and back. Nope! I'd gone far enough for one day! We had a flight early the next morning so there was no time to waste. We had to get back to the room, break down my bike, eat some dinner and THEN fall asleep.

Mom ordered a pizza from a place just below us and because we were leaving in the morning we only ordered a small pizza. It would be silly to get a big one.

The room key is in the picture for scale. This is a SMALL pizza.

My final tradition at Ironman is to buy the absolute cheapest champagne I could find, pop the cork, have about 2 or 3 sips and then pass out for the night. I was really excited this time as we had a balcony and I was going to blow that cork off into the night. I had my mom take a burst shot so she could get the moment of explosion. As I peeled back the foil I just started laughing. It became apparent that you should spend more than $4 on a bottle of sparkling wine if you want a cork. I had purchased myself  a fine bottle of screwcap champagne. After regaining my composure I decided to give it shake and then just open the cap really fast. This was less spectacular than I had even expected and only resulted in a wet sticky hand and a disappointing dribble of foam. It was perfect!

In retrospect I'm really happy with how the race went. Deep down I knew I wasn't going to equal my PR so being angry about not equaling that time would be foolish. I try to learn something every race and this time there is no doubt in my mind that the best thing I can take away is from that sign, "run the race that is set before you." Don't compare previous days, just take the challenges as they come and rise up to meet them.

The making of a celebrity :)

About four months ago the owners of New Deal Athletics asked if I would let them shoot a video around my story. Apparently some people think that what I'm doing is inspirational and want to hear about it. In all honesty I still have trouble believing that people want to hear my story but I'm a pretty open book so I agreed. This isn't a paid spot, I do get some clothing out of the deal, but I really believe in what the company stands for. They are committed to making good clothing at fair prices, and giving a portion of their profits to charity. All of the things I can appreciate.

WATCH VIDEO HERE!!!

At the time I had NO IDEA how much work went into shooting something like this. The minute long spot literally took hours and hours to shoot. It was a really neat experience to watch the cameramen work on getting their angles and the shots they wanted. These guys were pros and it was a fun experience. The hardest part for me was repeating my lines to get them just right. "Can you say it an just emphasize the third word." Or "say that again but like you're really proud." I'm a teacher, not a professional actor of stage and screen, but I did my best.

CLASSROOM BLOOPERS

I think what I really underestimated was exactly how much footage they would need for just a few seconds that were good enough to appear in the final cut. On the day we shot the running scenes I thought we were going to run for about five minutes or so, so I still did my full workout earlier in the day. After an hour and fifteen minutes of running past the camera I was tapped. My absolute favourite was, "that was really good.... but we weren't rolling." AAAAAHHH!!!

RUN BLOOPERS  

One of the best parts of exercising on camera is how focused you become on your form. Am I landing correctly? Is my knee drive good? Am I bouncing in the saddle? Jeeeez, holding good form for that long is really a challenge but MAN I looked good.

I had the opportunity to show a few colleagues a rough draft of the video and they asked if that was real sweat or did they just spritz me with water to make it look good. Hahaha, no. That was the real deal. They just told me to go through my regular workout and they would work around me. 75 minutes later I was looking at my watch thinking, "I'm dooooooone, but you're still shooooooting." So I assure, every drop of sweat you see in that video was the real McCoy.

BIKE BLOOPERS

When I arrived for the swimming shots I was shocked to realize I'd left my trunks at home. I did, however, have a pair of compression shorts I could throw on. They looked alright in the water but the walk out to the pool they were a little more revealing than I would have liked. You haven't seen somebody this big shuffle that quickly on a pool deck. But my covert mission was a success and I got into the pool without blinding anyone.

SWIM BLOOPERS

When I finally got to see the finished product I was stunned at what an amazing job they'd done with it. I wish for them that I was better looking but, hey, I did the best I could with what I've got :)

Please check out their website at www.newdealathletics.com/ and get yourself some great athletic clothing and support charities.

Clyde Pride

Perhaps what makes a person successful is that they're never really satisfied with what they have or who they are. Maybe that's why we often see the rich and famous fall into a depression that is so deep they may never crawl out. I am in a constant battle with myself to be happy with who I am and yet push myself to achieve greater goals and faster times and I'm not certain it's possible. How do you achieve peace with who you are and still have a burning desire to get better?

On a recent podcast Joe Rogan talked about his theory that our natural state of worry and anxiety likely stems from our past where we had to be vigilant or be eaten by predators. This has manifested in a constant struggle between being thankful for what we have and always seeing the negatives in our lives to prevent becoming complacent.

I feel I have been a fairly successful person in my life. I have a great career, an amazing family and my physical pursuits have become notable. This November I completed Ironman Arizona in 11:57:39 at 250 lbs which placed me in the top third of the entire race which is dominated by the very skinny. However, my first thought when analyzing the race was that it must have been an easy course if I had gone that fast. It didn't occur to me immediately that the 1900 or so people I finished in front of had to complete the same course, I could only reconcile that because I'd beaten my previous personal best by almost 2 1/2 hours that it was nothing I had done, it must have been an act of god.

My body image is absolutely atrocious. Despite losing 75 lbs and doing things athletically that very few people can claim I still look in the mirror every morning, sigh, and hope that tomorrow I'm not fat. I see people walking around downtown that look great in their suits and the sad reality is that I would probably trade bodies with them in an instant because they look the way I'd like to look despite the fact that they likely couldn't do half of the things that I can with my body. But why am I so focused on looking a certain way? I have an amazing wife that loves me so why does my aesthetic matter? There's something wrong in our brain that values form over function.

My big goal for the upcoming year is to really celebrate how far I've come rather than focus on my imperfections, which are numerous. One of my "ah ha" moments recently was looking at my tattoos on the calf of my left leg and wondering why I bothered to get one to commemorate an Olympic distance (1500m swim, 40k bike, 10k run) triathlon. At the time it was such a huge accomplishment that it garnered a tattoo, but now I complete the distances in that race as a part of a training day. I realized I needed to look at it and remember that it was a big deal to finish that race and the fact that it's easy now shows how far I've come. It's a symbol of pride.

3 tatted calves

I'm a Clydesdale (endurance athlete over 220 lbs) and I need to embrace that. I'm never going to be skinny, I'm never going to win a race and I'm NEVER going to look good in a tight pair of pants. But what I am is everything I set out to be 6 years ago when I decided to get in shape. I need to stop looking at the last 10 pounds and start looking at the 75 that are gone. It's funny, every time I get to a new lower weight I'm excited. Then, when I stay at that weight for a while I get upset. It was an accomplishment to get there and it's an accomplishment to stay there. I don't need to change anything but my viewpoint. Easier said than done but it will be my new mantra and I work towards Ironman Texas this May.

This song makes no sense!!!

Music is a huge part of my training. A good song can change the tempo of a run and a bad one can bring you down. As I hear some of my favourite songs more and more I start to question what the hell some of the writers were thinking when they wrote them.

Snoop Dogg is widely regarded as a bad ass in the song Gin and Juice. But in a song praising liquor and marijuana he states "and the party's still jumpin' cause my momma ain't home." Really? You're a hard core gang banger! But if mom's home then the party's over? WEAK!

Nicki Minaj! In the song Your Love she's talking about a guy she loves and a dream sequence she had: "Anyway I think I met him in the sky When I was a Geisha he was a Samurai Somehow I understood him when he spoke Thai."  AAAAAAAHHHHH!!! Geishas and Samurai are Japanese. You're right! Speaking Thai would be weird! NOT ALL ASIANS ARE THE SAME!!!

Notorious B.I.G. A legend, without doubt and the man I've chosen to model myself after. At least the big part anyway. Big Poppa is a wicked song but there's always one part that makes me shake my head.  He says, "If you got a gun up in your waist please don't shoot up the place."  A very reasonable request. However, one of the members of his crew asks "why?" What the hell do you mean? Why should he not shoot up a night club? I don't know, maybe because murder isn't cool. Maybe random shootings are bad form. Great song, bad lyric.

Jay Z. Another wonderful rap artist. However in Can I Get A there's a lyric I finally had to look up because I was confused. He's explaining to a young lady that he is courting that if she decides to leave him he still has the goods on her because they had relations: "I'm talkin bout good livin are we here, you wit us? If not boo, you know what, I still F$%&ed you." After looking it up I'm much happier with the lyrics because what I heard every time was most disturbing. I heard "you know what, I still F%&# sheep." Why would he do that? He has Beyonce at home! I don't like to judge but I found it hard not to. Anyway, great artist but annunciation can be critical.

These are just the most egregious examples I can think of currently. Rap artists, please listen. Just because something rhymes doesn't mean it works in the song!!!

What Went Right?

It's been a little over a week since my breakthrough performance at Ironman Arizona and I've had a chance to really analyze what exactly happened to allow me to perform at a level I never thought I could achieve. I've broken it down into a few key areas that I think many people in my situation could really benefit from.  Once again, I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination but what I do have is experience. I'm now a 5-time Ironman finisher and with that comes 5 full "seasons" of training that are anywhere from 3 months to a year in length and there are a great deal of learning opportunities in there.

The first and most obvious difference I made in my life was diet. The past few races I've hovered around 275 lbs and this was where I thought I had stalled permanently. As I mentioned in my previous blog on diet , it doesn't matter how much you train, if you eat like trash you will not lose weight. I finally knuckled down and got back on Weight Watchers and carefully tracked my food. The result was a loss of 25 lbs between Ironman Coeur d'Alene in June and Ironman Arizona in November. Not having to haul 25 extra lbs around for 12 hours was a really big difference in my day.

The next big difference I noticed on race day was my footwear on the run. For some reason I've tried to wear minimalist shoes to run marathons. If you've seen me, there's nothing minimalist about me. I'm 250 lbs for crying out loud!!! By switching from shoes that are little more that a cover for your feet to a shoe that resembles the shoes you wear if one leg is shorter than the other I took the bulk of the ground's impact out of my legs. Thinking about the fact that a marathon is 42.2km of running and your stride is around a metre that's 21,000 times each foot will strike the ground. If you can take the impact out of each of those steps that's a major difference and the result was a marathon time over an hour faster than any I'd done before. I implore you, if you are having trouble running a minimum of 10km without walking, stop what you're doing right now and buy a pair of Hoka One Ones. Or if you just like running pain free, whatever your reason, you NEED these shoes!

Hoka One Ones. I believe that's Hawaiian for Foot Love (I haven't looked this up).

For the past year or so I'd been having trouble with my left knee and I had never really taken care of it. It was weak and would give out on me when I was skating and I finally got fed up to the point that I went to physiotherapy and got it looked after. I realized how bad it was when the physio had me do some comparative exercises to see how imbalanced I was; it was ridiculous. On the leg extension machine, where you essentially sit in a chair and straighten your leg, I was unable to even lift the pad without any additional weight on it. My leg would shake and then collapse. Yikes, I was basically getting around on one leg. In a sport where your legs do the bulk of the work taking away half of your power system is a poor decision. I really focused on doing my physio homework and I'm at a point now where my legs are approaching equality again. The proof is in the pudding, as they say, and I turned in a bike split that was not only almost an hour and a half faster than any race I'd ever done, it was almost 50 minutes faster than the average time for ANYONE on that course. After the bike leg I was in 45th out of 220 in my AG and 414 out of 2700 overall.

All of these changes are good, but ultimately it is your training that is going to get you over the finish line of an Ironman, or any race for that matter. When I first decided to do an Ironman I relied heavily on the tutelage of people that had done it before me. One of these mentors was Kevin Cochrane. Not only did I teach alongside Kevin but I was a student of his when I was in the 10th grade. Kevin is a MULTIPLE Ironman finisher, not sure exactly how many but over 10 anyway and I hold him in very high esteem. We were talking shortly before my first race and I was telling him how nervous I was and he gave me a piece of advice that I've kept with me since. Kevin said, "you've already done the work. You've been training hard and now you just go out and do it." I sat back and realized he was absolutely right. You don't finish an Ironman on the day of the race, it's the 4am training session before work or the 11pm session on holidays that gets you over the finish line. I've used his words in two ways, the first is to calm myself before a race but the second is during training. I channel the mantra that "today is why you finish Ironman" on training days when I'm just not feeling up to it. This pushes me through my little hiccup and allows me to finish up my set and get the maximum out of my training.

My coach Jeremy was absolutely critical and I would recommend everyone get a coach, or at least join a team where there is some accountability to your training. By nature you have to be self-motivated to finish an Ironman but it is so nice to have people to brag to about a great session. You can tell your friends and family about how well it's going but if they don't have an understanding of what exactly you're talking about you don't get the same feedback or celebration as you do from a group of like-minded athletes. Jeremy had me push my limits in terms of how hard I would train during my sessions. A great deal of my runs and rides were "tempo" where you pushed yourself beyond your comfortable pace for an extended period of time. This did a couple of things for me: it allowed me to train less because you get as much out of a session going hard for a short period of time as you do going for a long slow ride or run. Also, my body got used to going fast, so on race day when I was just coasting it was still a really quick pace. In training I was consistently running 8 minute miles for half hour sets, so on race day when I was cranking out 12 minute miles it felt like a slow jog and I maintained it for just over 5 hours.

Another major change I made from Coeur d'Alene to Arizona was a greater focus on weight training. I've read a number of triathletes who have focused more heavily on weights recently than in the past and they almost all agree that the biggest difference for them is the ability it gives them to push a little bit harder when they need it. Whether it's passing someone, summiting a hill or just enduring a little bit longer it gives them that boost. I don't lift particularly heavy, I'm not trying to bulk up, simply give myself enough strength to climb a hill with some speed.

I start my next training cycle on December 2nd for Ironman Texas taking place on May 17th. It's exciting to know that by focusing on strength, tempo and weight loss I should be in great shape heading into Ironman number 6.

Train hard my friends!

Ironman Arizona: A Love Story

Unfortunately for you guys this trip was about as good as it can be so there's not nearly as much to write about as past races.

Mom and I left on Friday morning which, in retrospect, was a poor decision. First off, it meant we had to be up at the crack of F$%& to get to the airport. Two days before an Ironman is not exactly the best time to be missing out on sleep. You're right in that final prep phase and even if it doesn't have a physical impact on your performance the potential is there for a mental impact. Convincing yourself you're tired can be just as bad as actually being tired. The other risk you run cutting it so close is missing check in because of a flight delay. For Ironman you MUST be there 2 days prior to race day to check in. There is plenty of stuff to do prior to race day so this is a reasonable request by WTC (the company that owns Ironman). I decided to go down on the Friday to save a night in a hotel but when I look at the fact that it costs around $2500 to do a race, saving $80 on a hotel is a stupid risk to take. IDIOT!

As it happened, my Uncle Bill and Aunty Penny were headed out of town that same morning and because they're gone for a few weeks they rode with us so they didn't have to park their vehicle at the airport the entire time. Uncle Bill is kind of a big deal and flies a ton so he had some guest passes to the Air Canada lounge. What a civilized way to travel. As I sipped my cappuccino and snacked upon pastries I looked down on the zombies sitting in the departures lounge I smirked a grinchy grin. But it didn't matter. Their planes came just the same. They came without cookies, they came without wine. They came without wifi or couches divine! Sorry, got on a roll there. Regardless, it was so nice to be able to enjoy the lounge and relax that early in the morning, THANKS UNCLE BILL AND AUNTY PENNY!!!

We got through Calgary and on to Phoenix with no problems and seeing the desert sun was a welcome sight. When we got to the rental counter we were prepared for everything the agent could throw at us.
Agent:  Insurance?
Mom:   We've got it covered!
A:  Want us to fill the tank for you?
M:  Are you high, we can drive to a gas station!
A:   Glass coverage?
M:  Nope, we'll tell you that chip was there when we got it!
A:   Additional driver?
M:  No, I'll drive.
A:  Do you live at the same address?
M:  No. (DAMN! They got us on a technicality. I booked the car on Priceline so I have to be a driver) 
A:   Bigger vehicle?
M:  Hmmmmm, ok.  (I've done Ironman with a full size and it's not terrible, you just have to break you bike down a little to get it in the vehicle. So we upgraded to an SUV. Very nice. Let's keep this upgrade train rolling)
A:   Costco member?
M:  Yeah, why?
A:   Oh, well it's a cheaper upgrade fee. Tell you what, I'll waive the additional driver fee too.

FINALLY! My charm and good looks get me something

We were so excited to be in the warm weather that we decided to start driving before the GPS had synced with a satellite, in no particular direction. As it turned out we guessed poorly and headed away from our hotel, but we did it with purpose and I think that needs to be commended.

We stayed at the Four Points by Sheraton in Tempe and it was great. Nothing amazing but a nice hotel close to the race site and the included breakfast was a nice surprise. They were also really supportive of the race and even had rags at the front desk for wiping down your bike so you didn't use your room towels. Great idea!

Friday evening was the traditional "carbo load" dinner so mom and I headed down to the event and, after a bit of off-roading, we found a sweet parking spot and headed into dinner. It was the standard chicken and pasta meal but they had a really nice seasoning on the chicken which was a nice surprise. It's an outdoor dinner but rather than sit at the tables mom and I decided to sit on the hill and eat and that was a really good decision. Not only was it nice to sit on the grass the setting made my deplorable table manners much less noticeable.

Saturday was a really nice day. After checking in my gear bags and bike we headed off to the outlet mall. I picked up some sweet deals on some skinny guy dress pants and some new Under Armour. The weirdest part of the day was the Christmas tree. Apparently the tree at the mall is the largest in the region and we were there on the day of the lighting. They had bleachers set up and people had staked out their spot before noon. Now on its own that would not be terribly weird, but the fact that it was 25 celcius and we were surrounded by cacti made it surreal.

That evening we went to the Arizona State football game. This is a real experience; I would encourage you all to try and get to an NCAA football game. The pageantry and tradition surrounding these games is just awesome. We stayed until half time as I needed to get some sleep but the show we saw up to that point was spectacular.

As I've mentioned before I try and learn something every race and improve upon it for the next time. This was no exception. I was always getting to the race site way too early so I timed it a little better at this race and arrived at 6am. This was perfect timing. It gave me enough time to get myself ready but not so much time that I was standing around bored. I did my standard bike check and to my chagrin my rear tire had popped over night. Fortunately the bike techs were amazing professionals and had my tube replaced and inflated in about 3 minutes.

Off to the swim start and this was a different experience than I've had before. Because of the nature of the venue it's a deep water start. This means that you're in the water floating around waiting for the start. I liked it because you really get acclimated to the water temperature and relaxed in your suit, and by that I mean you pee yourself. Before getting into the water I was chatting with a guy named Barry, bib number 2695 and I told him I'd look him up after the race to see how he did. I was absolutely thrilled when I looked him up and saw that he finished in 16:59:18. 42 SECONDS BEFORE MIDNIGHT! The last minute to qualify as an official Ironman finisher. So happy for him and I hope he gets to read this.

The water in Tempe is probably the only negative in this entire race. It's so murky that you can't even see your hand in front of your face. This wouldn't typically be a problem if you were just swimming but because of the concentration of people it makes for an uncomfortable swim. You are constantly swimming into people's feet and getting kicked in the face. It was a benefit to have enough experience in these events that I was able to keep calm despite the beating I took during the swim. It really was no one's fault and that makes it a lot easier to stomach. The organizer can't do anything about the water. The fact that we're swimming in a body of water in the middle of a desert is a miracle anyway so to complain about the water clarity would be ridiculous; and your fellow competitors can't see a thing so you can't blame them for slapping you around.

Overall the swim went exactly as expected, just keep moving and get out as best you can. As I stepped up onto the stairs my left calf cramped and I fell off the stairs back into the water. I grabbed the railing and pushed my foot into the stairs until it finally released. The amazing volunteers then lifted me out of the water and got my wetsuit off of me and I jogged into transition.

I mentioned I've learned from previous races and one of the things I tried this race was complete outfit changes. Typically I wore my tri suit under my wetsuit and just dealt with the wet and cold. One of the big downsides to a tri suit is that the chamois (pronounced "shammy") or butt pad is thin because it's designed for you to run in it after cycling. I decided to wear proper bike shorts which would take a little longer to put on but should lend a great deal more comfort over 180 km of cycling. This turned out to be a great decision and led to the best ride of my life.

The bike course is 3 loops of an out-and-back highway ride. It is fairly flat and can be mentally draining if you're having a tough day. Fortunately, I was having a great day! At first I was a little worried because I was passing people non-stop and flying at around 35km/hr on the outbound leg and on the return I was holding steady at 51km/hr. This sounds great but you start to wonder how you can possibly maintain this speed over the entire ride. After the first lap the wind turned on us and slowed up the group a little bit. Being a loop course I really enjoyed being able to time myself between familiar parts of the course. I really enjoyed focusing on pushing myself between different landmarks and seeing how I was progressing. At Ironman you're not allowed to listen to music while you race so you need to think about something. I finished up the bike leg in 5 hours 17 minutes.

Now, this bike ride went about as perfectly as you can expect but I did learn a valuable lesson. Knowing how fast I was going I did not want to stop for anything, even bathroom breaks. So, I stood up on my pedals, relaxed a little, and just peed. Ahh, sweet relief. However, I learned very quickly that if you have one foot at the top of the pedal stroke and one at the bottom your straight leg creates a very nice channel from your crotch to your shoe and it will quickly fill with pee. So, fellow triathletes, if you try this time saving technique keep your feet level with a bend in your leg so it will run off and onto the ground. Coincidentally my shoes now live outside the house permanently. (Kim says:  If anyone ever needed proof that I support Colin wholeheartedly with his tris, the fact that I washed his butt pad soaked pee pee bike shorts without tongs is it.)

In transition I again did a full outfit change. This went really quickly though, considering I even had to put on my fancy time consuming socks with a separate place for each toe. I threw on my Hoka One One runners and headed out of the tent. I felt pretty good considering how hard I hit the bike course and my legs quickly came around after the first mile or so. This run was a completely different experience than any other I've had. Typically I just try and survive the run and do a lot of walking. If I see some other poor sap walking along I strike up a conversation and try to chat away the miles. This race I was up with the serious competitors and they're not down for a chit chat, they're racing. This was great for me because there was no temptation to walk. Somehow I managed to run from aid station to aid station (1 mile apart) and only had to take extra walking breaks a couple of times.

I think the funniest thought I had was 3 hours into the marathon. I had done the math and realized that I could actually finish under 12 hours. "I just have to keep this pace for 2 more hours." That was it, just run this same speed for 2 more hours, and it didn't even phase me. Even 6 months ago thinking ahead by 2 hours into a run would have been ridiculous. There was very little that I could have done better during this run. I kept the same pace throughout, my nutrition was such that I never got nauseous or sloshy, and I learned one very important lesson. I learned how to be comfortable being uncomfortable. By that I mean that I was able to evaluate how my legs and lungs were feeling and even though they were burning, it was an amount that I could handle for a seemingly indefinite period of time.

Another lesson I learned will be very important for any future races in warmer climates. In swimming lessons we were taught that heat leaves our body from our head, armpits and crotch and so that we need to cover those areas if we're stuck in water. Using this I decided that to cool down on a run those are the areas I need to focus on. At the aid stations they hand out cups of water and I thought it would be a great idea to pour this ice into my crotch to keep cool. It worked pretty well, until a few aid stations in when I realized that I'd frozen myself solid. It didn't really hurt at this point it was just an odd feeling. No, the REAL pain comes when you begin to thaw out again. Anyone who shoveled snow as a kid remembers that feeling when you skin would thaw out after being outside for too long. That burning under your chin or your the tips of your fingers. This was EXACTLY like that, only on my jimmy junk! Yikes man! Lesson learned. The worst part is that when I got home and told my wife Kim about this story she looked at me and shook her head and said, "You said the exact same thing after Ironman Los Cabos you idiot!" Doh! Ok, lesson learned this time for sure!

Post race was just so awesome. I was so happy about my time that I didn't notice just how bad my legs were feeling. I grabbed a quick piece of pizza and a chocolate milk and found my mom to head back to the hotel. I actually didn't know what to do with myself because I usually finish so late in the evening that I go straight to bed but it was only about 8pm so there was plenty of evening left. I ate the amazing PF Chang's that mom had picked up for me and packed up my bike. After a bottle of champagne I crawled into bed and waited for my 2am hunger attack. This came right on time and I attacked the club sandwich I had waiting on the night stand.

I'm still truly stunned at how well this race went. In my wildest dreams I couldn't have crafted a situation in my mind that had me finishing under 13:15 so to go sub 12 was ridiculous. I have to thank my wife Kim for allowing me to spend stupid amounts of money on my hobby of triathlon and my mom for being my faithful sherpa and helping me get my stuff around the race. However, the greatest thanks for this result has to go to my coach Jeremy Potter who has put enough faith in me to give me workouts that were just unbelievably tough. He saw potential in me that I didn't see in myself and he pushed me beyond my limits. The biggest downside to a race day like this is the new bar that I've set for myself. I have no idea how I can replicate a day like this again but I thought that about this go 'round.